Holiday Festivities

Some of the fun I had in Vernal was baking cookies with Scott. 

Doesnt Scott look like a young Santa with his beard? I completely love it!

Scott wanted raspberry frosting for the sugar cookies. It was genius! AND delicious.

This picture shows the reality of me--but I had to document the fun we had making these cookies. I am so thankful Scott helped. He was tired after 12 hour work day yet he stayed and helped with the cookies and got them ready for delivery to friends.

Scott is very conscious about creating official dates. We went to a movie-We Bought a Zoo. It was a lovely movie. 

Another date night we went driving around looking at Christmas lights. We stopped for a treat at Farr's ice cream. Scott chose raspberry whip and we ate the whole thing! It was delicious. 

Scott was concerned about my lack of cold tolerance. I have lived in the mild northwest too long I guess. Well he stopped at a drive thru coffee stand and got me hot chocolate. I chose house blend hoping for a good cup to cocoa. Vernal did not disappoint! I sipped and was pleased to be drinking an almond joy. It was chocolaty, coconutty, and plain delicious! I cannot wait to have another one!

I came in one evening to this picture. It was priceless. For me this Kodak moment was the ultimate magic happy moment. I am so thankful for so many things and the main one is Scott. Because of him I have been taught so many things. I am so grateful to have him in my life.

I did not reach my goal as mentioned in last post. But I did throw away pictures of my married life.

I guess I will get there. 

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to everyone!

My friend Andrea Healton gave me a bear nativity set! I love love love it. She has been a friend for over a decade and I am grateful for her support. I am also grateful for the black bear. I have fond memories of my Grandpa Jones telling me stories of Greasy Bear and his adventures in Yellowstone. I have collected black bears for almost 15 years. I completely love my newest addition!

I spend Christmas with Scott. We had a wonderful dinner of steaks and shrimp. Scott was a master chef and I was the supporting table setter. I am so thankful to have somewhere to spend my holidays. 

Scott and I completely spoiled each other. I have enjoyed my days here in the cold Uintah Basin. I am torn. I dont want to go back to my empty apartment and to the cold rain. I am not ready to leave Dr M and the wonderful boss he is! I am ready to be closer to my parents. Although Portland affords me some distance which makes the separation from family easier to deal with. I am scared to get married again. I am afraid of failure. I know how to be single. I dont know why I cannot commit already. I have known Scott for 7 months. I feel I know him very well. He continues to impress me and show me the kind of man he is. I am thankful for the trials we have had and the hardships that have brought us together. He is not comfortable being single and is so patient while I try to work through my fear of failure. 

I have hopes of working through it soon. My goal this week has been to set a date for marriage before I leave for Portland. I am closer to picking a day than I was a week ago, but afraid to solidify and commit. 

Who Gets Access to My Life?

I have been wondering for weeks what to post. I am a woman who uses words and writing to get my feelings and emotions out and processed. I have not been able to through my blog which has been hard. I feel censored on here. I cannot write how my hearts hurts and how my heart soars with happiness. I want to be able to write what I want and not hurt feelings.

I am in Vernal spending Christmas with Scott. I am thrilled to be here in the cold. There is a satisfaction of playing house-cooking etc that I have never experienced before. Yet I cannot fully enjoy the experience. It is killing me.

Other side note for journal purposes-Dan has been back in Portland for one week. He has been in USA for about two. He calls and texts often. I rarely respond. I did today. He texted asking if my dental office took tricare dental insurance. I said I didnt know and that I didnt think it was a good idea for him to come to my office. I am still floored that he even thought about coming to the office! My co-workers witnessed the ugliness. Dan is definitely not welcome there. ugh.